What is addiction? It is a brain disorder that forces us to do compulsive actions that hurt us and others. Why we do it? Because it makes us feel good at the moment. Every addiction now matter how it expresses is the result of trying to escape from an “old” reality that causes us pain.
“Behold, I am doing a new thing: now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?”
Isaiah 43:19
It started as a moral problem but after so much repetition is part of our coping mechanism. Because has affected our brains, pure will power is not able to make us stop. We don’t need repair, we need transformation.
“I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove for you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh”
Ezekiel 36:26
We all get addicted to something that make us forget the pain even if it is for a minute or two. For some the coping involves gambling, shopping, food, alcohol, drugs, pain killers, amines (caffeine, morphine, cocaine, MTA, nicotine) and in your case, likely dopamine (again another amine) due to sexual gratification and also adrenaline caused to risky behavior. Understand that you did not create this. It may sound shocking but this did not started last night and will not go away overnight. It is likely that it started early in your childhood or teens. Addiction runs in families. If you look at your own family and draw a genogram you will be surprise how much you have inherited. I can assure you, much more than your looks, even the bible mentions that the sons inherit the sins of the father. Yes, it sounds unfair, but tell me if it is not real. There is so much to learn, to understand why you do what you do. Why certain things hurt you deeper than others. We have walked this path before. We can help.